TFLN aka Tales from Folkmore

[folkie]

TEXTS FROM LAST NIGHT

Welcome to Folkmore's Texts From Last Night meme! This meme can be used as a branch off from our Test Drive Memes and be used as game canon or just for casual fun in the setting! You do not need to be in our game or be invited to play on our TFLN. This can be a great way to meet current players for future invites, get a feel for the setting, or just have some fun.

This can be used for samples on our applications and used as spoons for players accepted into the game!

TEXTS FROM LAST NIGHT GENERATOR

Comments

Vex'ahlia Vessar | Critical Role | Legend

[usedhuntersmark]

1. I walked in to find you surrounded by tins of cookies and the cake I made for a special order. What in the hell did you do last night?

2. Which one of you assholes thought it would be funny to DYE MY BEAR BLUE????

3. All I know is that you better clean the kitchen before I get home or else.

4. That's it. I'm cutting off your access to anything until you tell me what made you think that using Reverse Gravity was a good idea while everyone was sleeping.

5. Text her.

1

[morethan25characters]

....

[He spends a long time before the next text.]

I've been experimenting.

John Egbert | Homestuck

[heirlift]

1. my dad used to tell me that ironing boards were surf boards that grew up and got real jobs. i think it was supposed to be inspiring.

2. i'm probably single because i didn't forward all those emails in 2008...

3. did you know that you can just drink gravy? ask me how i know.

4. could you do me a favor and subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?

5. (text him! misfires welcome!)

3

[givehead]

With the right enthusiasm, you can drink anything, John. The throat is a velvet soft slick tunnel prime for the taking.

Zagreus | Hades

[intheblood]

1. I am honestly a little disappointed by those around me and their stunning lack of ability to dance on the stripper pole. Must I do everything myself?

2. Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.

3. Unless you're going to start buying my underwear, I'll have to ask you to stop ripping it off of me.

4. I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it.

5. (text him! misfires welcome!)

2

[kyley_b]

at least she needs it to be explained?

nill | DOGS: BULLETS & CARNAGE (crau)

[culver]

1. I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.

2. In case you were wondering, my scarecrow is wearing your outfit from last night.

3. Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness.

4. You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people.

5. I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?

6. In my defense, it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.

7. text her!

1.

[overnightoaks]

Oh, well... Can you at least tell me if it's vegan?

sunny 🔪 omori (familiar)

[oversleep]

1. it's that "make a pringle and twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
2. burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef.
3. i woke up because i was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
4. it's like a squid of sadness has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
5. i wanted to be you for halloween but i couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.

5

[kyley_b]

SUNNY!

Poppy Wilkes | Midnight Poppy Land | Legend

[hamsterballs]

1) I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.

2) So how's your rug burn?

3) I'm a 21 year old former lifelong virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.

4) I went to button my shirt only to find all the buttons were missing.

5) [Text her. Misfires welcome.]

4

[distantguardian]

What on earth happened to all of your buttons?

dirk strider | homestuck

[givehead]

1. Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least an honorable mention?

2. No, drunk sperm still make babies.

3. Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp.

4. The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.

5. Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me know so I can clear my schedule.

6. Choose your own

5

[kyley_b]

dirk, aside from ken i cannot think of a single person who would actually want that for their


ok i can only think of like two people who would actually want that for their birthday.

Ryo Maclean | FAKE

[distantguardian]

1. Coworker just walked in thirty minutes late, reeking like weed, and clutching a handful of scratch-off tickets. Also, there's still a stripper pole in my office. Happy Wednesday.

2. Who on earth tries to steal eggnog?

3. Last night was a bad idea... I'm hungover and my jacket smells like Korean BBQ...

4. Because some sorority went "Dick or Treating", the Halloween parties are cancelled...

5. Oh, for goodness sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???

6. "Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. That's how drunk.

2

[arclightning]

You'd be surprised. Some people get desperate for the idea that there might be alcohol in something.

Hayan Park | Unholy Blood | Legend

[thorncrown]

1) I just want to apologize because I had a vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off somehow.

2) Why is the door in the middle of the street?

3) I walked outside and you were laying down talking to a star about your life.

4) At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?

5) [Text her. Misfires welcome.]

4.

[intemperant]

To be completely honest, it's already far too late for that.

billy kaplan-altman ( marvel comics )

[wordiness]

1. oh, they just started a mariachi cover of free bird.
2. i can count the number of hours you've been sober this weekend on one hand.
3. i have donuts and i'm beautiful.
4. i brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy in your yard.
5. [ or you can text him. ]

3.

[subroutined]

Alright.
Is anyone disputing those claims?

Reko Yabusame | Your Turn to Die | Myth

[musicaldemon]

1) stripper pole. sore legs.

2) dude take a shower you'll feel like god has washed away all of your sins

3) Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed.

4) just walk up to him real nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT IT!!"

5) [Text her. Misfires welcome.]

4.

[natzoom]

Thank you for the suggestion. I will be doing none of that.

Junpei Yoshino | Jujutsu Kaisen | OTA

[moondregs]

1. Painting a pumpkin on your butt is NOT a Halloween costume!
2. There was an all fox production of 'Rocky Horror Picture Show' on while I was flipping through channels.

I can't believe I watched all of it but in my defense the fennec playing Janet could really sing.
3. The rabbits near your home asked me to relay the message: "Your scarecrow ain't shit."
4. No, candy corn is not 'technically' a vegetable!
5. Text him!

2.

[overnightoaks]

I think you mean FOXY Horror Picture Show!

hawks | my hero academia

[redfeathers]

1. Apparently, I was pointing at birds and yelling "WE USED TO BE DINOSAURS!!!"

2. I was watching iron chef and got motivated, so I made dinosaur chicken nuggets.

3. I will give you a bj if you get me food. Not even joking. Free BJ.

4. Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? You need to let me know these things ahead of time so I don't worry.

5. I won't be sarcastic... just naked.

6. Text him!

3 I'm so sorry

[vociferates]

Dude. Just come over and I'll cook for the three of us. Don't sound desperate, yo.

Helga Pataki | Hey Arnold! | Myth

[oldbetsy]

1) i prefer the term 'tenderly watching'

2) those nachos came to me in a dream

3) get up before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spooning you have going

4) we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away

5) why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall

6) [Text her. Misfires welcome.]

1

[kyley_b]

it's stalking, pataki. we are stalkers.

megumi fushiguro | jujutsu kaisen

[tenshadows]

1. He challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for my virginity.

2. You tried to call the hospital and left a voicemail asking if you could be put on the liver transplant list as a "pre-caution".

3. I gave the naked guy on the side of the road a pop tart. He stopped crying.

4. Apparently I confessed my love for him last night.

5. Why is my Divine Dog covered in whip cream?

6. Text him!

5

[snakeandfangs]

Good question, Fushiguro-kun.

I have no idea.

Kyle Broflovski | South Park | Legend | OTA

[kyley_b]

1. if i dress up as a "typical white girl" for halloween that means wearing yoga pants and uggs all night. i'll look stupid but i'll be extremely comfortable.

2. i'm not winning any crowns in the mr. emotionally stable pageant either, you know.

3. what is a normal amount of fear to have re: fangs and dicks?

4. i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully...

5. i'm about to punish you for sending me a pic of your boyfriend's morning wood

4

[usedhuntersmark]

And how many half-elves do you know besides myself?

Dimitri Alexandre Blaiddyd | Fire Emblem: Three Houses

[beastliness]

1. And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my boyfriend out of a dress with a sword.

2. Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform minor surgery.

3. Did you put a bounty out on my virginity?

4. Text him!

1

[thinkfirst]

[ hot

wait no ]

Was your boyfriend unharmed after said procedure?

Hizashi Yamada | My Hero Academia | Familiar

[vociferates]

1. Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?

2. I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.

3. You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.

4. He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door.

5. Text him.

3.

[floatsaway]

Sometimes violence is necessary against villains
Mineta-kun deserved it
I would've used the desk if your glasses weren't closer

I'm very sorry, sensei, I hope they weren't damaged.
I'll accept my punishment graciously...

Narmoluin / OC /Legend

[narmoluin]

1. i'd love to sympathize with you but i'm drunk in a mansion

2. it was really awkward... i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was just his roommate

3. dude stop singing. your life is not an episode of fucking glee

4. we're going to catch a squirrel this summer

5. i think i have an advantage in chugging contests. i know how to just open my throat

6. Owo what's this?
(there, I did it, now fuck off)

4.

[subroutined]

And then what? What will we do with the squirrel once we catch it?

Henry Oak | Dungeons & Daddies | Legend

[overnightoaks]

1. Nothing bonds a father and son like washing his puke off the front steps.
   
   
2. THINK! Exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my house??
   
   
3. The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
   
   
4. Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day!
   
   
5. Vodka and carrot juice. If I'm gonna drink I at least got my 8 servings of vegetables.
   
   
6. Text him!

1 / blanket cw for child abuse/neglect

[greatwhiteme]

l. m. fucking. a. o

maybe other dads sure. my old man would probably push my face in it then make me clean it with a toothbrush. is that the kind of bonding you're talking about?

Ash Starmer (2.0) | Black Mirror | Familiar

[subroutined]

1. Oh FYI, people asked how/why I met you and I didn't want to say "they were drunk at a party on an air mattress" so I made a story up. It was a very cute and charming story with no alcohol.
   
   
2. Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
   
   
3. Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
   
   
4. How do I respond to this? It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me."
   
   
5. Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
   
   
6. text him!

4

[pursuitofcappiness]

"I'm only looking for something casual right now"?

Heine Rammsteiner | Dogs: Bullets & Carnage | Myth

[halsband]

1. Well, maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
2. I guess I owe you an apology. So... unfuck you, or whatever.
3. At which point exactly did I become “the guy to talk to” for this?
4. Why is it sticky?
5. That's a horrible idea. What time?
6. (Wildcard)

3.

[theladyofhighever]

When you were the only one to respond to as mass text.

Steve Rogers | MCU

[pursuitofcappiness]

1. I smell like candy and I don't know why.
2. Someone changed all the contacts on my relic. Again. Who's this?
3. Please bring me a change of clothes. Someone stole all my laundry and all I've got's the suit.
4. Text him!

3

[greatwhiteme]

nah man! you take your walk of shame with pride!

dabi | boku no hero academia | myth

[burnitblack]

1. it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
2. every newspaper in the prefecture reported that i'm dead. hilarious, cause i'm mostly alive.
3. i woke up to a text that said "you're a fucking asshole". what happened?
4. there's a fine line between kinky and serial killer.
5. i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
6. try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you.
7. it's always fun when the only thing they ask me is "how are you still alive?"
8. sometimes, in the course of human events, people get set on fire.
0. Text him. Misfires welcome, from anyone and anything.

5.

[subroutined]

You've not done anything terrible to me. (Yet?)

Spock | Star Trek | Familiar

[kaiidths]

1. I did mention that it was unwise to consume so many corndogs in such a short amount of time.

2. A lesson has been learned. I will not be accepting unknown substances from animals again.

3. I thought it pertinent to let you know that you did, in fact, purchase a boat last night. However, I am certain you are still within the standard return window. It would be wise to take advantage of this in a timely manner.

4. I told you that I am opposed to hijinks. Please respect that.

5. Text him!

3.

[subroutined]

Cheers for that. I guess I got so excited by the possibility that I could buy anything that I went out and bought the biggest thing around.