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folkmore mod ([personal profile] folkie) wrote in [community profile] folkooc2023-04-26 09:04 pm
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April 2023 Test Drive Meme

April 2023 TDM
Introduction

[ TDM QuestionsJump to CommentsFull Navigation ]

Welcome to Folkmore's monthly Test Drive Meme! Please feel free to test drive any and all characters regardless of your intent to apply or whether you have an invite or not.

All TDMs are game canon. You can choose to have your TDM thread be your introduction thread upon acceptance or start fresh. Each TDM will provide a scenario for how characters arrive in-game that particular month.

Playing TDMs will allow characters to immediately obtain canon items from homes especially weapons or other things they may have had on their person when they were pulled from their worlds! There will always be a prompt that provides some sort of "reward" to characters who complete certain tasks.

Current players are allowed to have in-game characters react to TDMs via the Network or make a log with the prompts. Current players are always encouraged to tag new people on the TDM!

TDM threads can be used for spoon spending at any time by characters accepted into the game.

[ Prompt OnePrompt Two]

worms.
Content Warnings: hallucinations, poison, giant worm

One minute you were a falling star, but as your body reforms you become aware of one important detail: it's friggin hot.

That's because you've landed in a desert! Yes, you have had the misfortune of landing in Cruel Summer, the hottest and arguably most dangerous part of Folkmore. Lucky you!

The first bit of good news is that you're pretty sure you can see a train station off in the distance, although it's extremely difficult to judge exactly how far off due to the flatness of the terrain. The second bit of good news is that you have awoken with either a canteen of water, or an umbrella to keep the sun off. The third bit of news - good or bad, depending - is that you've awoken near another Star Child. Whoever this is will have the opposite gift than what you received; if you have water, they have an umbrella, and if you have an umbrella they have water. Well, you know what they say: sharing is caring! Undeniably the water is a touch more important, so hopefully whoever has it isn't a colossal dick.

As you trek through the desert towards the distant structure, you will notice periodically the air off to either side of you will shimmer. You may dismiss it as merely the heat playing tricks, but if you choose to investigate you will find mundane weapons like swords, guns, shields, etc.

At some point as you walk, you will feel a tremor beneath your feet. It grows in intensity until suddenly the sand sprays everywhere as something bursts forth from the earth below!

Wavering above you is a blood red worm. It is large - end to end it runs about thirteen feet - and its segmented hide is tough enough that rocks bounce right off of it. You might have more luck with bullets or bladed edges, but it's still going to be a tough fight. It also boasts some impressive offensive tricks; its mouth is ringed with many rows of fangs, and itspits a thick yellow acid that will corrode your skin and your weapons if you're not careful. If that wasn't enough, during your fight you might here a sudden brrrrrrrrrapppp! as the creature farts lightning at you. Hilarious... until it knocks you to the ground.

You would do well to work as a team to take this monster down. You and your partner might have powers or skills that could come in handy, or maybe you're quick on the uptake when it comes to any new abilities afforded you by your new role!

If you defeat the worm in battle, a golden chest will appear. Inside of it are items from your homeworlds - these rewards are especially likely to be any weapons you owned back home.

But hey, maybe you're a lover, not a fighter. There's no judgement here in Folkmore. You can outrun the worm instead if you're both fast and clever - finding any terrain that is more rock than sand will give you a decided advantage.

Once you have either defeated or escaped the worm, you will find that you come upon a small group of tents. Under their shade are first aid supplies, and kiosks manned by fennec foxes offering water, food, and shaved ice. Nice!


so scarlet it was.
Content Warnings: emotional trauma, impalement

Giant death worms aren't the only danger in the desert, they're just the most obvious.

Even if you avoided the worms entirely, you still have to make it to one of the train stations in Cruel Summer. As you trek across the dunes you will gradually become aware that over the sound of wind and shifting sand you can hear someone singing. You feel an urge to follow the sound to its source.

This song could be anything - one that exists in your world or others, or just a melody spun in the air for the first time. Whatever it is, it is heart rending; tears may spring your eyes as you follow the sound, precious moisture falling to the thirsty desert ground.

The singing is coming from a cactus. It is taller than most humanoid creatures, tinted purple and pink at the tips, with abnormally long spines. Its song reminds you sharply of some deep loss from your past, and at the same time inspires a terrible compulsion to go to the cactus and sink against it.

And what a relief it is, to embrace that melody and feel the spines slide easily through your flesh to pierce your heart. You do not bleed. By some strange alchemy, your heartache drains from your body as liquid, filling the cactus and causing its flowers to bloom and its song to cease.

You could very well stay pinned there, dying a slow death of desiccation, but lucky for you Star Children are all over the place this time of the month and someone is bound to see that you need help.

Trying to pry someone off of the cactus is impossible. The key lies in the flowers - they must be removed. When they are, sweet liquid will spray from the place where it had grown, dousing the rescuing Star Child. With this impromptu shower comes psychic flashes of the painful memory that has trapped the victim.

Once all of the blooming flowers have been removed, the cactus will retract its spines and release its prisoner. There will be no physical wounds left from this encounter.

You will also discover nearby that there is now a golden chest. Inside of it are items from your homeworlds, although none of these items are weapons.


Thankfully, you should be able to reach either Oozlum or Obambo Station without further incident. At either of these you will be able to get some water and supplies, as well as get the hell out of Cruel Summer.

necrosavior: (profile; shades zoom in)

[personal profile] necrosavior 2023-05-01 01:18 am (UTC)(link)
"You want to figure out what's going on with technology, visit Thoth," Gideon says, "That's the tech school and where the majority of the that kind of nerd hang out. People have a wide range of tech where they come from."

She gives an easy shrug. Tech nerd she's not. What she knows the way anyone knows the basics of their world. The stuff you can't help but know.

Gideon cracks her knuckles and rolls her head around a couple times. "Welcome to where my world gets weird compared to the rest," Gideon says, "We're high tech, yes, but our tech is based on necromancy. Blah blah planetary requirements blah blah thanergy thallergy blah. You wanna know more, talk with the nerds."

She pauses, realizing that she never paid attention to that stuff. It never mattered to what she was going to do. Gideon shrugs. She assumes they do it.

"The Ninth House's location is also super secret so enemies can't find it. It's inside the planet itself, so fly around, if you don't know where it is, good luck finding it. You terraform that shit, you're blasting that location to all corners of space."
zechs_isonfire: (06 skeptical)

[personal profile] zechs_isonfire 2023-05-01 01:29 am (UTC)(link)
Zechs frowned, a little uncertain if he’d be useful there. He elaborated, “I’m not a scientist myself. I know enough engineering to maintain my own equipment, if needed - but that is all. I’m not certain there will be a lot of use I can provide for them.”

He felt adrift here, he knew that immediately. Zechs knew he was looking for some kind of task, some goal - preferably, some threat. Otherwise, why would the fox take him at all? Unless, of course, Zechs was supposed to be threat everyone would unite against. Again.

It’s harder to accept that role if he didn’t know why he was playing the villain.

Gideon’s explanation was a good distraction from getting too stuck within his own head, too caught up in his own brooding. “Necromancy. You fuel yourselves off of the dead - your enemies, perhaps? Does war fuel your technology?”

Magic wasn’t real to Zechs, before. But war was something he understood. An endless war to fuel ambition and power - Zechs couldn’t help but hold a certain tension in his body, of revulsion.
necrosavior: (mood; stubborn)

[personal profile] necrosavior 2023-05-01 01:44 am (UTC)(link)
Gideon looks over at her company unimpressed. The misunderstanding makes them sound like shit. There's plenty shitty in the Nine Houses. Gideon got to hear it first hand right before she came here, but that's not it.

"Time for basic biology lessons," Gideon says, even as she holds herself ready should he attack. "Our bodies are made of cells. They don't last our whole lifetime. About every seven years or so, you're made of an entirely new set of cells*. That means at any given time, you have cells living and dying in your own body, creating life energy and death energy, the two kinds of energy used in necromancy."

She looks at him, like, see.

"Everyone who dies in the Nine Houses continues to serve somehow after death. In the Ninth House, after everything else has been processed and you're down to the bones, that usually means being a skeleton farmer. Skeletons work the fields growing snow leeks to feed the living.

"In battles, sure, necromancers use the energy of the dead, friend and foe, but can you tell me, where you're from, people don't use whatever they can in the middle of a fight?"
zechs_isonfire: (mask - quiet)

[personal profile] zechs_isonfire 2023-05-01 01:52 am (UTC)(link)
Zechs looked away, his expression shuttered. He realized belatedly, by the way she started to walk - she’s preparing herself for an attack. Something by way of his reaction was read as a threat. He could curse himself - of course it was.

“Don’t misunderstand me,” Zechs said quietly. “Of course we did. I guessed necromancy fueled your war, because it is what my reality would have done with that same magic. It is not your fault that humanity is just as vile everywhere. I am not blaming you.”

Another moment of quiet, and he went on, “Our world had seen such war for centuries. Only recently, through dire measures, has peace broken out at last. If your planet, hidden from the rest, was able to exist with some measure of peace - I admire them for it.”
necrosavior: (- pls no)

[personal profile] necrosavior 2023-05-01 03:42 am (UTC)(link)
His admiration takes the wind out of Gideon's sails. She's not in the Cohort (yet) (ugh). However, his admiration is not deserved. Centuries are pitiful compared to what her universe has been up to, all because two groups of people can't let go of shit from even longer ago. She rubs her palm against her forehead, above her sunglasses.

"The Ninth House generally stays out of it, but turn that admiration around and wrap yourself up in its warmth," Gideon says, "Because the incredible powers of intergenerational hate-ons in my universe makes yours look like nothing."

In the tone of explaining the birds and the bees, Gideon explains the five thousand year old conflict, "Ten thousand years ago, the world died. Humanity survived two ways far apart from each other. One without necromancy. One with necromancy. They lived their separate ways for five thousand years, expanding into space. When they found each other, they hated each other so hard they started a war they've fought ever since. Five thousand are you fucking kidding me years.

"On the left, we have Necromancy is Wrong and Must Die. On the right, we have We Stayed on the Dead Planets."

She exhales loudly. Yeah, so much for admiration.
zechs_isonfire: (are you serious - manga)

[personal profile] zechs_isonfire 2023-05-01 03:50 am (UTC)(link)
“That’s madness,” was Zechs’ first reaction. Not at the necromancy, which he accepted because he had to accept a talking fox. “Five thousand years. Too much is easily lost in the interim - human memory is fickle. And yet they carried that torch of hatred for so many millennia …”

Zechs had to take a deep breath and unclench his hands. Since she’d been apprehensive before, he said, “My anger is not directed at you. I am - let’s say disappointed, that humanity has found a reality to exhibit even more deplorable behavior than what I’m already familiar with. A war spanning across inhabited planets. For a time longer than most civilizations can stand. I can only imagine how many have perished who weren’t even soldiers at battle.”
necrosavior: (Default)

CW: references to murder, mass murder, and war

[personal profile] necrosavior 2023-05-01 02:24 pm (UTC)(link)
Gideon nods and takes the reaction. She's not a soldier, but she spent most her life wanting to be one. She never questioned the war. It'd been going on five thousand years, half the lifespan of the empire. It'd never occurred to her to question it. All she'd seen was a way off the Ninth House. The only way off the Ninth House.

Worse, Gideon probably would still take it, if it'd been offered to her, like her worst self. She and Harrow figured shit out off of the Ninth House, but there's no way they could've there, not with Crux and the great aunts and everything about how they worked there. There was no life for her there. So judge away, newbie. There's more than one reason Gideon's a Myth.

"I know I'm bad at letting go of grudges," just take a look at her mom and dad, how could she not?, "but I'm not five thousand year war bad at not letting go of grudges."

She sighs. "Can you imagine? In five thousand years? That's a looooooooot of people," Gideon says, "directly in battle, indirectly because of lack of food, reshuffling to refugee planets, people's nerves getting fried and taking it out on each other as civvies, yadda yadda yadda." She's read about it in novels. And comics. And on occasion thought about it more seriously. Mercymorn killing John—killing Dominicus, killing the Nine Houses, killing millions.
zechs_isonfire: (04 fury)

[personal profile] zechs_isonfire 2023-05-01 05:42 pm (UTC)(link)
Zechs was all too aware of the cost of war. From his infancy, being taught how immoral violent conflict was, taught to take the higher road; to witnessing the massacre of his family; to becoming a soldier himself, a killer first-hand. Zechs had crafted himself into his world's Myth for a reason. Such wars could not be allowed to continue.

Hearing Gideon had come from an even more dire timeline made his expression darken considerably. His jaw clicked as it tightened, his eyes cold. Zechs had been driven and then succeeded in taking revenge on many, many people by the age of nineteen. He understood a grudge. "There are personal grudges, and then there is whatever should fuel such a hatred for thousands of years. That scale of bloodshed is nothing if not evil."

"I can imagine." Zechs' thoughts were all turned inward as he did. He could imagine himself witness to such a reality, and knew what he'd done in his own world to stop something lesser. So, "Perhaps it is fortunate I am not from your reality."
necrosavior: (= making a face)

[personal profile] necrosavior 2023-05-01 08:02 pm (UTC)(link)
Gideon thinks of John Gaius—God, her dad biologically if nothing else until recent awkwardness—and manages not to disassociate because such declarations aren't new. Augustine asking him to stop. Other conversations about such things. Yep, pretty incredible scale of bloodshed. Note to self: enroll her dad in Eleanor Shellstrop School of Self Betterment? She might not be the best suited to... help him.

"Cool cool cool, sounds like you can imagine being involved in that," Gideon says, "You already know I'm from there and I'm a Myth, so how about you confess your sins if you want to call them that, past deeds that could get you massively hated if you don't. If there's one thing I can tell you, it's that the more you keep that secret, the more Thirteen will force you to share it with someone. At least this way, you get to choose sharing it with me, your Mythic pal in shithole war worlds. Though you said yours reached peace? I'd be curious to hear about that."
zechs_isonfire: (we'll see about that)

[personal profile] zechs_isonfire 2023-05-01 08:50 pm (UTC)(link)
"You keep mentioning this Thirteen," Zechs remarked, a little wryly. Given these circumstances, it did seem pointless to hide his past actions. He wouldn't judge her on the fact she was a Myth alone; but he should be judged, and treated accordingly, for what he's done. She didn't seem fragile, someone to protect from ugly truths.

But the idea he'd be coerced to speak made Zechs internally bristle. "Who, or what, is Thirteen? Why do they believe it should have any right to command us to do things which might be against our will?"
Edited 2023-05-01 20:51 (UTC)
necrosavior: (profile; grimy)

[personal profile] necrosavior 2023-05-01 09:33 pm (UTC)(link)
"I'll note for the record that you didn't respond to the suggestion," Gideon says first. She looks over at her companion, and even behind sunglasses her face says she will not forget what she asked, nor his failure to respond.

"Thirteen is the fox you followed to get here. She's a fox god-like being, godlier than the gods that are here as Star Children," Gideon explains, "Official reasoning is to help us achieve our potential. It's definitely also to generate lore. That's what we're doing now. Interact ⟶ Create lore. This might be the part where you go *hiss hiss autonomy my choices i wouldn't do what you drag me to do for a single corn chip hisssssssss* and I get it. Look at me. You're looking in the mirror.

"Thirteen's not dumb. Nor a dumbass like me. That's why I mentioned sharing. My second month here, there was this thing where you'd trip and fall when you were next to someone, and you'd be stuck where you fell until you shared something deeply personal with them. I was like fuck that shit, so I got ahead of her, I fell on my own, and I shared on my own. You know what? She never made me fall."

Gideon pauses and even stops walking a moment.

"More seriously, she let me use this mirror trial where you get a gift from home to get this bomb that was going to kill this other me," Gideon says softly, "That way when we had to send her home—that was a different trial—she didn't die. She got to go home and live and you know... have a whole life. That wouldn't have been possible without Thirteen."

In the context of five thousand year long wars, one life is a small thing, but it's hers... even if it's not. That means something to Gideon, along with the rest.

"I don't think Thirteen entirely understands what matters to us, and I don't think we can entirely understand her either. She's not pure evil. She can be worked with. That's more than I can say of some people."
Edited 2023-05-01 21:33 (UTC)
zechs_isonfire: (libra - manga)

[personal profile] zechs_isonfire 2023-05-01 10:29 pm (UTC)(link)
Zechs stopped alongside her, as he carefully listened to what she had to say. He didn't know Gideon. Had absolutely no reason to trust her, to believe she was doing anything but telling him something outrageous for her own amusement. And yet, there seemed so little utility in that. He already knew a fox, somehow, took a version of themselves to this place, and changed them. Based on their supposed roles.

Based on that alone, everything she explained seemed to logically follow, in a way. Plus, given that they were completely alien to one another - what would be the point in lying about any of it? So, it might all sound completely ridiculous. But Zechs had no choice except to believe her.

And the fact this so-called god was neither evil, nor good, rang truest of all. Very few things were truly evil. That war Gideon mentioned might be one of those things, but persons rarely were.

He waited until she was done explaining, before he told her - calm, blunt, and without much emotion;

"My name is Zechs Merquise, but I was born Milliardo Peacecraft. Despite the war which had raged for centuries, my father as king lead our nation through his philosophy of absolute pacifism. He would not compromise on it. He would not lend his people nor our country's resources to battle. And so he, and nearly my entire family, was murdered for it."

"I sought revenge. I had achieved my revenge. And yet - it was hollow. It didn't matter that my country was now free, that my surviving sister could rule it, untainted by the blood I had spilled. The war went on. More and more atrocities were being committed, and the people I admired most in that conflict stood on the opposite side, and were losing. And then my country fell again, my sister captured, made a puppet of tyrants."

Zechs took another breath, continued in that same calm tone. "There was a machine, that showed its user possible outcomes to their actions. It allowed me to consider a new path, a path to true peace. It showed me a possibility I had discussed once, with a man I considered a friend, but whom also was often an enemy. If there was someone so terrible, who committed an act so heinous, that it would unite all the Earthsphere against them - that would finally bring peace, if someone could actually play that role."

"And I was prepared to do so. After I understood that terrible possibility, I was given the opportunity to lead a faction of terrorists who happened to possess the right kind of firepower. With Libra, I would be able to send the Earth into a nuclear winter that would kill billions. The survivors - and everyone in the Colonies - would hate me, and the idea of war, forever. Peace would be had at last."

"I abandoned the name of Zechs Merquise, which had hidden my true identity - and I took up my birth name of Milliardo Peacecraft, son of the pacifist martyr, to become the true evil that everyone could unite against."
Edited 2023-05-01 22:46 (UTC)
necrosavior: (- pls no)

[personal profile] necrosavior 2023-05-01 11:16 pm (UTC)(link)
Pacifist nation led by King Peacecraft. Touch on the nose eh? She listens to a story not particularly surprising, if a touch underwhelming at first. Gideon didn't grow up with a family, but she has Harrow and friends now. She'd do a lot now. At the same time, her stomach gets a sick feeling with the various memories of killing Crux, some the real Crux, some not, some happened yet, some not. Abruptly, she wants to vomit, but she holds her face passive as a silent nun. The silent Ninth at Canaan House. Listening.

Surprise! Revenge didn't work out!

Zechs describes something much much worse than his personal revenge. Seriously, why does everyone want to nuke the earth? Of all the points to have in common with her dad, seeking revenge until everyone involved is dead + nuking the earth didn't need to be the two. How about bad puns and a taste for weird flowy robes?

"Everything gone through on that by the time you came here?" Gideon asks, "Because when I said ten thousand years ago the world died, it'd been dying, and someone finished it off with nukes. They nuked it, and you've heard how much that's put people off war. So I'm curious, real reeeeeeeeeal curious, to hear how that went for your universe."
zechs_isonfire: (10 regret)

CW: suicide, suicidal ideation

[personal profile] zechs_isonfire 2023-05-01 11:36 pm (UTC)(link)
Zechs’ stomach twisted at her account. Surely, it didn’t? That couldn’t have been the impetus to that evil which had lasted for so long? While he’s inclined to allow her to think the worse of him - he had to refute that much.

“I didn’t.” Zechs looked down now, his voice no longer calm - it was hushed with guilt. “I was convinced in the end that peace would proceed without those deaths. That the fact I was the monster they could unite against was enough.”

“I destroyed Libra,” he admitted. “I did not intend to survive it, but I did. I should have perished along with the war.”

Zechs looked at her. “There has been peace since. One year ago, someone attempted to use the child of my friend and enemy to start another one - I revealed myself alive to help stop him. And yet there was still peace after.”

“Instead of execution, or imprisonment - which I would have equally deserved - I was sent to a distant planet, to help terraform it.” A beat. “Being a Myth does not make me a monster. I had accomplished that on my own.”
necrosavior: (action; fistbump bikini)

[personal profile] necrosavior 2023-05-02 03:08 am (UTC)(link)
"Well that's something," Gideon mutters. Someone convinced him he didn't need to kill billions of people. Well, if he listened once, he can listen again. That's a good skill to have for self-betterment. Go Mr. Six Million Monsters in a Trench Coat.

Pulling out her spoon, Gideon thinks for a moment. Then a foam sword appears in her hand.

"One, of course sending you to terraform a planet is a better option, then you're doing people more good than sitting in a cell reading titty mags and planning ways to bust out if someone kidnaps a kid again," Gideon says, "Two, you. are. a. person."

She baps him on the head with the flat of the foam sword and jabs him in the chest with it.

"You stop thinking of yourself as a person and as a monster instead, that lets yourself off the hook. The real hook. Because you're not the bogeyman. Even if you're immortal, which you're not. I will eat all the foam in this sword if you're immortal. You did your scary bit. Time to make shit better, and that. includes. you."

She points the sword at him again.

"Welcome to the Eleanor Shellstrop School of Self Betterment. There's no unenrollment process, you accomplished idiot."
zechs_isonfire: (strained)

[personal profile] zechs_isonfire 2023-05-02 03:25 am (UTC)(link)
Granted, if he was in prison and something happened to Treize’s daughter - or Relena - or any possible children his sister might have in the future - well, Zechs would break out and deal with it. It’s an appropriate assessment of his drive to protect. Gideon seemed on the money, there.

The spoon bewildered him. The foam sword bewildered him further. Enough so that he wasn’t expecting the bonk on the head, and the poke to the chest. He spluttered - not because of any physical complaint, but due to the mere surprise of it all.

And mostly because her words hit harder, truer to the bone, than a fake or real weapon could.

Zechs, notably, did not debate against being referred to as an ‘accomplished idiot’. It reminded him a bit bittersweetly of Noin - even if she would’ve lectured him about self-forgiveness instead. Gideon appealed to his work ethic instead, his drive to continue to improve.

“I’m not immortal. I’m as fallible as any other human,” Zechs agreed, subdued and perhaps a little contrite. “You’re correct. There isn’t an excuse for me not to attempt to work toward improving myself - especially as the self is all I possess here, removed from my reality.”

It simply might be a task much like Sisyphus pushing a boulder endlessly only to fail - Zechs thought it was worth that eternal struggle all the same.Until such a time where his death was required.
necrosavior: (mood; o rly)

[personal profile] necrosavior 2023-05-02 03:50 am (UTC)(link)
Gideon nods, somewhat surprised that this enrollment goes down so smoothly. It's probably a sign it'll be a terrible time later. Far be it for Gideon to deny herself the small wins, so she takes it.

"As any other human and any other person," Gideon agrees. She slides that in there, not-subtly, to remind him partially what the point is. He's not a machine or magical theorem, to be optimized via math or engineering. He's all messy and organic and not entirely making sense in a purely necromantic fashion. It's personhood.

"You need to treat yourself like a person. You've ingrained this 'I am a monster' attitude, and that's not going to go away overnight because you've agreed you're a person now," Gideon says. "Every time you catch yourself thinking you're a monster, I want you to do two things: I want you to tell yourself 'I am a person, not a monster' and also to keep a daily tally mark. That way you can see how often you're having those thoughts over time."
zechs_isonfire: (are you serious - manga)

[personal profile] zechs_isonfire 2023-05-02 04:15 am (UTC)(link)
Zechs had been training to become the best for the majority of his life, even as a prince one might argue. Gideon unwittingly chose the best argument to get through to him.

To a certain extent.

He frowned at her. “That seems utterly pointless. I don’t need a record to confirm my memory of events - I know all too well my failings. I can’t see how having a physical record of something I’m already aware of would prove fruitful.”

Making a vague sort of gesture, Zechs said, “Surely with all of the places you listed - there is something I can do instead. Working toward a task that would better others will produce actual results.”

And what he’d been essentially doing on Mars.
necrosavior: (action; flex (killing it))

[personal profile] necrosavior 2023-05-02 03:26 pm (UTC)(link)
"Memory is faulty," Gideon says, "Besides, it's easy. We just use a tabulating app on your relic. You're basically pushing a button and going on with your day after you tell yourself you're a person not a monster.

"I'm not saying that's all you're going to do. I'm saying it's something you're going to do."

She waves the sword and resumes their walk toward the train station.

"Of course you're going to work on some task to help people. That's what you do. If that's all it took, you'd be better by now. Cured! Do you think if you help enough people—more people than you hurt—you won't be a monster? Being a good person isn't math!"
zechs_isonfire: (unimpressed)

[personal profile] zechs_isonfire 2023-05-02 03:49 pm (UTC)(link)
Zechs' jaw clicked, but he held his tongue. Being a good person wasn't math. He already felt that doing as much as he could for people, working as he did, wouldn't solve anything. There's one thing he could do in order to truly atone ... and the moment wasn't ripe for that yet. It had to mean something.

He reasoned he should keep that to himself.

Continuing to walk behind her, he gave the back of her head an unimpressed look. "I'm merely saying it's pointless. Even jesting about a cure seems rather unrealistic as well. I've not contracted a virus - I've made choices which hurt others. That will not be changed. Given the immutable past - I might as well serve a productive present."
necrosavior: (mood; o rly)

[personal profile] necrosavior 2023-05-02 04:08 pm (UTC)(link)
"No, being a person isn't something that can be cured," Gideon says, "Redemption or whatever you want to call it... doesn't make up for the wrongs you've done. Crux could, I don't know, end the war single-handedly and it wouldn't change what he did to me. Even after all that, he could beg for my forgiveness, and I doubt I could give it."

She knows he won't do that. He's going to die at her hand to open the tomb. A sacrifice when death is guaranteed to do something. It hardly makes up for everything.

"Look, I am zero percent interested in stopping you from serving 'a productive present,'" Gideon says, "In fact, I agree it's good for you. The problem you have is you're entirely externally focused. You gotta work on the insides too. Now, you can work on it with me—by choice—or you can work on it as Thirteen pushes you too. She might push you to either way, but in my experience you'll have more control, more a say so, if you do some of it yourself by choice.

"Which sounds better to you?"
zechs_isonfire: (11 try me)

[personal profile] zechs_isonfire 2023-05-02 04:24 pm (UTC)(link)
Zechs wouldn't ask anyone to forgive him, either. Whether it was his sister - living her best life, from all accounts, far away from him - nor his former enemies, whom he respected deeply. Given that he didn't believe he deserved it, perhaps that wasn't surprising.

His expression darkened a little. Zechs did not like being backed into a corner - feeling like his choices had been taken away from him. Even while the future unspooled before him in the ZERO system - he felt he had options in the one he chose. And, so, he chose the one that would lead to peace, no matter that he had to become a monster to do so.

"It seems a mere illusion of choice, if my hand is forced regardless," Zechs quipped. Focusing on himself - who was he, really? He's been playing at different roles, wearing figurative or literal masks, since he was six and his family murdered. It seemed like an impossible task. Zechs kept that to himself, too. "And you think making a list somehow corrects what's inside."
necrosavior: (Default)

[personal profile] necrosavior 2023-05-02 05:57 pm (UTC)(link)
"You can always look for doors three, four, five, six, seven, eight, and nine," Gideon suggests, "We can reach the train station and part ways. Thing is, there's no war to solve. No problem bigger than ourselves and each other on a personal level—like me helping you, not like stopping a war.

"It's about finding choices."

Gideon sighs. "You could walk beside me you know. My ear is just as interesting as my shoulder blades."

She thinks for a few steps, thoughtful and not spouting the first thing off her mind. "I've been stuck in the back of someone's head before," Gideon says, "Back home, not here. It's weird. Point is, I didn't simply experience the world how people treated her and that walk a mile in another person's shoes idea but how she saw the world. Like, some things probably happened a whole fuck lot differently, and I can recognize that... it doesn't tell me how it actually the fuck went. The inside of our heads shapes a whole lot about ourselves and the world.

"So no, making that list isn't going to correct everything. It's only a tool to make you aware of one thing going on in your head. There's a fuckton more going on, I'm sure."

Gideon thinks of Eleanor, worried about trying to save the afterlife for all of humanity. Gideon's trying her best and feels over her head half the time, but at least nothing like that depends on her efforts. At the end of the day, Eren, Zechs, and anyone else are responsible for their own actions. That lifts a weight from her shoulders.
zechs_isonfire: (contempt - manga)

[personal profile] zechs_isonfire 2023-05-02 06:57 pm (UTC)(link)
"I'm not about to wish war upon a peaceful world," Zechs said, even if it seemed he's a little reluctant. It's the truth, though! It was merely ... frustrating, there wasn't some larger goal to focus on. He was certainly willing to help others, at least - but for them to focus on him instead? Zechs would certainly pass.

He made a soft sound of affirmation, and pulled his boots more determinedly out of the deep sand in order to keep up with her. Zechs would love to get out of this godforsaken desert. He listened, once again, to another fantastic sounding story. Once more, he had no reason but to accept it as truth. It seemed like an odd thing to make up, and again, she had no motive to do so.

"Being trapped within someone else's mind seems like a unique sort of hell," Zechs observed quietly. "Especially given the horrors you've already described that your reality endures."
necrosavior: (action; fistbump bikini)

[personal profile] necrosavior 2023-05-02 08:14 pm (UTC)(link)
"It was an accident, sort of, I think," Gideon says. She waves one hand and the foam sword with it in a vague non-threatening manner. It's not the point. There's been far, far worse in her experience.

"Could you indulge me on this one thing?" Gideon asks, "Calling yourself a person not a monster, every time you mentally call yourself a monster, and pressing the little tally button on your relic. It's really not that much.

"You can even think of it as helping me because you're helping me keep my promise to my friend Eleanor Shellstrop who's no longer here. If she comes back, I want to be ready to help her do this mind betterment stuff because where she's from the fate of billions depend on it."

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