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Texts From Last Night

Welcome to Folkmore's Texts From Last Night meme! This meme can be used as a branch off from our Test Drive Memes and be used as game canon or just for casual fun in the setting! You do not need to be in our game or be invited to play on our TFLN. This can be a great way to meet current players for future invites, get a feel for the setting, or just have some fun.

This can be used for samples on our applications and used as spoons for players accepted into the game!

Texts From Last Night Generator

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Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yukk it up, beardy, I already said that you win. It's totally bullshit, but apparently SOMEONE (Bran) thought that him complaining about all of the things in Kirkwall which should have been done took it as Varric volunteering for the job. NOT ENOUGH LOLS ON ANY PLANET after I found out. But he still has to stand for family. 'Cause I said so.

It was a sarcastic celebration.

All I've won is vomit beard and a hangover. I loooose.

What are lols? Some sort of money?

Okay. Text is weird, usually my super amazing sarcasm sense picks up everything, but text is like. I can't hear the tone of voice or see the look on their face. Which is annoying and fucks with my super amazing sarcasm sense. No, they're a text thing. LOL=laughing out loud. RESPONSIBILITY HAS COME KNOCKING AT VARRIC'S DOOR. Of course I'm going to LOL.

Is there a way I should write sarcasm?

How are people supposed to know that? Who teaches this stuff?

I dunno. Emojis? Common text abbreviations? But for the love of the Maker, never use the eggplant emoji. People here? There was someone who'd just found emojis and she seemed pretty thrilled by them. But you're changing the subject, the subject is us pointing and laughing at Viscount Varric in the most loving way possible.

Emojis are the little paintings. My friend Tony taught me about those. I like the little dragon.

No, why would we laugh when Varric must be miserable? He hates politics.

And he's explained why never to use the eggplant emoji? Because it's funny! That he spent so much time complaining in Kirkwall about how things were supposed to be done that they took it as him volunteering for the job! Irony funny is still funny! And it's more of a gentle teasing than anything. At least for me, given the whole future Princess Regnant of Starkhaven thing.

It's a dick! But again, I think the dragon would be better.

But is he happy? I know he loves Kirkwall and helping Kirkwall would matter to him but... is he happy?

That proud of your dick, then? It does matter...but do you really think that ANYONE we associated with will ever be happy? And not have a splinter in their brains which we caused?

One, yes. Two, a dragon is way better than an eggplant. That's just a so-so vegetable.

Yes! Of course they're going to be happy! I'm going to make damn sure of it.

I still haven't found out if there's an emoji for a vagina. Some things are beyond our control. Sucks, but that's how it is. Which I'm sure you're very familiar with.

I was told about a peach.

But I can do something about making sure my friends are happy. I can fix that.

See, I've only ever seen it used as a reference for an ass. And for me, the ass is a strictly out-zone. Well, sure. Of course you're gonna try. I'm trying too. I'm just reluctant to say that yes, this or that tactic will bring out what we want for them.

You're missing out but to each their own.

If the tactic doesn't work I try again. The thing that matters in the end is that they're happy. And that I've done all I can to make that happen.

I'm pretty sure I'll be fine without it. Besides, there's the whole "needs babies" thing. I can't get a baby out of my ass. I'm trying, too. Don't think I'm not. Not for a single second. But there are limits to what people are willing to accept. I can offer a hand out of the abyss. It's up to them whether they take it or not.

That doesn't make you special. I can't get a baby out of my ass either. ;D

Our friends will always reach back.

LOL, didn't figure you could, but you never know! Maybe there's a world out there where only the guys have babies, that could be interesting. They will. I just worry that after everything, if I'm really good enough for them.

I'm going to start asking people if their universes are like that now.

Careful. Aveline will punch through reality to tell you off for that kind of talk.

So am I! Wouldn't it be great if that was how it works in other worlds? That's just gonna make me say it louder so that she does. Few things would make me happier than being told off by Aveline again.

Somewhere it works like that.

I would love to hear Fenris sigh at me.

Really? Have you been to a word where it did? THAT TOO. I miss that. And Bela's everything. You know you're in for a fun adventure time when you're helping Bela with something. Other than the Arishok, that's the exception which proves the rule.

No, but it's got to be possible.

Isabela and I had our rough patch after the whole business with the book and stealing and all that. We were never close like we were before it.

Well, if you find it, come yelling at me. Because you know me well enough to know I'd come yelling at you. :D Really? That's kinda sad. If anything, it made me and Bela even closer because of the whole duel for your life thing. And she thought it was hilarious to test Seb's vows when it came to me. The whole 'I know priests aren't supposed to enjoy combat but YOU DO' kind of thing. And sex stuff. Can't forget the sex stuff.

There's no way I'm going to keep that to myself.

Yeah, well, you and I are different people. I also always thought Isabela liked women better than men. Which is fair, we're idiots. I tried not to mix her and Sebastian because they clashed.

Guys having babies! Tell Aveline, too, that way she and Donnic can have a brood of strong, red-headed babies! Oh, yeah. Don't I know it. And I think she does, too, but I was in the market for a serious relationship and she didn't seem into that. Which is fine, to each their own. And, really? It always seemed more like lighthearted teasing between the two of them to me. Or did Bela never mention why she had to sit in for Chantry services to you? Bad Girl Special? No?

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da_champion - 2023-03-04 12:10 (UTC) - Expand

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survivorsguilty - 2023-03-05 02:07 (UTC) - Expand

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