1. i should start naming my random boners. you know, like they do with hurricanes? because each one is an absolute disaster.
2. yes there's a double standard. get over it, fuck the haters, and go be the slut you were born to be!
3. not much, just going to shave my junk and take pictures of it wearing fake mustaches i found at the dollar store. they're surprisingly realistic! much better than the cockstaches of my youth.
4. bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle.
5. lesson of the night: sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
6. one is full of apple juice. one is full of piss. this is real russian roulette, buddy!
John Egbert | Homestuck
2. yes there's a double standard. get over it, fuck the haters, and go be the slut you were born to be!
3. not much, just going to shave my junk and take pictures of it wearing fake mustaches i found at the dollar store. they're surprisingly realistic! much better than the cockstaches of my youth.
4. bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle.
5. lesson of the night: sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
6. one is full of apple juice. one is full of piss. this is real russian roulette, buddy!
7. (text him!)